So horribly American.

I am quite disappointed with myself this week. I have been terribly, horribly, no-good-very-badly American. Of course, there are positive ways to be American. But I have been the embodiment of all that is crap with our country these last few days. So maybe that's being a bit dramatic - I haven't jumped in a Ford truck with my cowboy hat on, screaming obscenities about other races - but here's what I have done:

1. Language - English only, please. Up until this week, I really tried to speak in German whenever I could. Chatting at work, buying groceries, out with friends... all (or mostly) in German. This week, I've been so lazy! Other languages sound like background noise. If I don't catch on to a conversation right away, I'll just nod and smile along with everyone else. I have no fucking clue what's going on, but if they laugh, I'll laugh. I've gotten quite good at looking like I understand a conversation.... but I'm really just pretending to pay attention while I sing inappropriate Eminem lyrics in my head.

2. Travel - if it's convenient. I am in Munich. Have I seen Munich? Eh, not really. I went down to the Old City once or twice, had a few days of looking around.... but no, I haven't made a conscious effort to get to know the city. To be fair, I did go to Frankfurt for two of the four weekends I've been here, but still.

3. Culture - .... I've actually done alright with this one. German soccer, biergartens, operas, good people, good times.

4. Patience - none. Um, yeah I haven't had much patience this week. There isn't really anything in particular that I can point out... but I worry about stupid things that really don't matter. It's very American to want things done now, decisions made now, to be overly busy instead of pleasantly bored.

I'm just having one of those weeks where I irritate myself. I have the capability to understand virtually everything in a German conversation, I'm just not trying hard enough. I could respond in German, but I don't. I have an U-bahn ticket paid for by the company, but haven't really used it. There are museums, gardens, bars, and historical sites to see, but I haven't seen them.

I think I'm just burnt out. Tired of having to try and understand German, tired of not having everything come easily to me. I know, my life is sooooooo difficult. Yuck, stop whining.

Well, we're just going to have to fix this somehow. I don't like being irritating to anybody, and especially not myself. The solution: I am only working four days a week from now until I leave - I'm using five vacation days to take Mondays off. This should give me time to spend some time in Munich on the weekends, but also see other places around Germany. On the agenda for this weekend: Munich. Museum Villa Stuck, Bayerisches Nationalmuseum, the English Gardens, a free walking tour on Sunday, and Olympiapark. Alle auf Deutsch. Keine Englisch. (All in German, no English.)

Oh yes, and Germany plays Spain in the EM final on Sunday... DEUTSCHLANDDDD! Maybe I'll even dress up like a crazy German soccer fan, just to make up for my lack of effort this week. As for now, I will be memorizing verbs and sentence structures because I'm in Germany, and dammit I'm awesome.


---